aw thank you so much, you don’t realise how that makes me smile and aw don’t be silly you don’t want to look like me :-)) xx
way too much :/
i feel so ashamed, all this misery has gotten to much, and I just don’t know what to do,
day in day out..
i feel like a total fuck up
no one will ask what’s wrong, because i cover it up with a smile - fake,
of course.
but that’s not the point, i feel like i can’t turn to anyone, as my problems are so minor in perspective with the world, that people wont take me seriously and move on with there theoretically “perfect” life.
i ask myself, why, why me,
then i think about other people and the problems in other parts of the world and think that it must be awful to live like that, i should count myself lucky,
- but i don’t and i shouldn’t be forced to do so either,
my problems are still there and they exist,
it’s reality,
I just wish I didn’t feel so helpless,
everywhere i go i feel tension and hatred towards me,
forever feel like i shouldn’t be here,
feeling unwanted by the people i most care about
i push people away
i get scared
and i’m sorry for all the shit that i’ve caused in my life
breakfast- nothing
lunch- nothing
snacks- slice of apple pie with cream (450kcals)
- cherry bakewell (200 kcals)
- choc ice (90 kcals)
- 2 kinder choloate mini (142 kcals)
and for dinner i am having jacket potatoes & salad, i feel so ashamed.. too many calories :-(((
NEED TO LEARN TO NOT SNACK O M F G